Tales from a Middle School Jungle

Me: There is a flash of light, and a woman dies.  What happened?
Student 1: Did God speak to her?
Me: No.
Student 2: OMG, SHE WAS RAPTURED!!!
Me: No.
Student 3: Ohhhh, she was raped.
Me: WHAT THE HECK!?

"When I grow up, I want to be a potato."

When kids finish their work early, I have a whole shelf full of games for them to play.  Some are math related, others are a bit of a stretch (but teach focus or perseverance or other crucial skills...at least I justify it that way.)  One such stretch game is "Spot it".  The kids have to find what matches on the two cards.

One of the symbols is a yin yang.  A group of kids had this out Friday and were playing, and I hear "POKEBALL!" repeatedly being shouted.

Guess this game is going to help them with their vocabulary too.

Student: YES, we got new seats!
Me: Yep, find your name.
Student: AWW MAN, I'm in the front?
Me: Yes, right next to me.
Student: But I have to sit in the front for all my classes.
Me: Do you think that might be for a reason?
Student: Uhhhh...I guess so.  Can I change with [other student] so I can sit next to [best friend] instead?
Me: Yeah, no.

Student: Hi, I'm new.
Me: Oh, okay.  Whose class did you transfer from?
Student: No one's.
Me: So you're new to the school?
Student: Oh no, I was here last year.  I just took last week off.
Me: ...

Instructions: Please make a name card with the name or nickname you would like to be called this year.